Penny Lane

Penny Lane

My young grandsons and I dance around the living room singing a Beatles standard, “Penny Lane is in my ears and in my eyes….” We are having a jolly time. The three-year-old suddenly stops and asks, “What does it mean, Penny Lane is in my ears and eyes?”

The melody of the song sweeps us away as I ponder his question. To Paul McCartney, composer of the song, it refers to the sights and sounds of an actual street in his hometown of Liverpool. McCartney used the experiences of his life to flavor his lyrics. Experiences and memories from childhood flavor our lives too.

Gary Marcus, in his 2004 book The Birth of the Mind, writes that newborn brains are not a “blank slate” waiting to be filled: “The initial organization of the brain does not rely on experience… Nature provides a first draft which experience then revises… Built-in does not mean unmalleable; it means organized in advance of experience.” In other words, we are born with innate understandings which are shaped by our experiences. Our brains are prewired to be rewired.

Cognitive scientists suggest that every human possesses innate moral foundations (loyalty/betrayal, liberty/oppression, harm/care, fairness/inequity, authority/subversion, purity/degradation) which are active from birth. Just ask any two-year-old about the fairness of his sibling having two cookies while he only has one. These innate foundations are revised by experience. 

Here’s a very simplified example. Lonnie, age three, is jumping on the couch and knocks over her mother’s favorite vase. Lonnie knows that jumping on the couch is forbidden. Her mother puts her in time-out. Lonnie pouts, (“It was an accident!”) After a few minutes, her mother explains the rule again and Lonnie skips off to play.

Lonnie learns that she must accept the consequences for her actions. She also learns that breaking rules does not cause her mother to dislike her and that Mom wants to keep her (and the house) safe. What if Mom had shouted at Lonnie or struck her? What if she had shut her in her room and ignored her for hours? What would Lonnie learn then? Experience shapes understanding. 

Back to Penny Lane. I explained to my grandson that the song is about the memories we keep as we grow. We remember images and sounds so that we can learn from them. I asked him what was in his eyes and ears. He listed riding on the train, playing in the sand, dancing with his brother and singing with his parents. His ears and eyes hold happy memories. 

What images are in your children’s ears and eyes? How are you helping them to revise the “first draft” of their moral mind? Adults direct children’s moral impulses by the experiences of living they provide. Are you providing happy memories, good experiences, and thoughtful conversations? 

Children’s eyes are bright and their ears are sharp. Fill them carefully.