Brrrrrr!

Brrrr!

When I was growing up, my father lived in a different climate. Let me clarify, while he did travel with his job, most of the time he resided with us. It’s just that he never seemed to be in the same temperature zone as the rest of us.

In the winter, he was not cold – inside the house at least. While my sisters and I complained that there was ice on our windows – on the inside – he told us that the house was not cold. We compensated in various ways. Maria slept with the cat, Carla used the dog and I kept a hot water bottle hidden in my sheets.  I could almost imagine my brothers huddled around a fire in their room, good Boy Scouts that they were.

In summer, we had the opposite problem. He was never hot. We begged for years for air conditioning, but until his allergies demanded it, our cries were in vain. Once we had the A/C, we never turned it on. “It’s not hot,” my father would assert as we melted. Of course, he was not hot. He was at work – in air conditioning – while we were at home sweating.

Now, my father was not a tyrant or unreasonably denying his children what they needed. He was just the man who paid the bills. I imagine that there were a lot of them for a family of ten. We never got frostbite or heatstroke. There was food on the table and clothes on our back and we were very well loved.

Kids always want what they don’t have. Today they want every electronic device advertised, each new fashion accessory and whatever the other kids “all” have. They can’t live without them, as they will repeatedly tell you. Parents have to be the ones who say, “No.”  I learned that when I had my own kids. Pinching pennies is a parent’s pastime. Trying to spend them is a kid’s. 

My children used to moan that there was nothing to eat in the house. Of course, we had three square meals a day. They had nothing to wear, yet their closets bulged. It’s so cold. That’s what sweaters are for. It’s so hot!  Isn’t that fresh air great? Round and round they go and when will they stop? The day they have their own children.

That’s what makes family life so great – it repeats itself. And every generation goes through the same cycles. That’s the way it should be. The parents are the teachers; the kids are the students. The lessons need to be learned. 

I look back with great fondness on my childhood. I learned my lessons well. Did you? I once heard a speaker telling parents that if they are giving their children everything they want they are teaching them a very bad lesson. Good things need to be earned. Bills need to be paid. You will not expire if you don’t have most things. You may shiver a bit, but you will compensate (remember that hot water bottle?) and come out stronger and wiser. So throw on another blanket or open a few windows.

Your kids may gripe, but you can smile thinking about how your grandkids will pay them back.